Fact: Back in 1920, the Russian transplant pioneer Serge Voronoff made headlines by grafting monkey testicles onto human males.

What I took from this: I think I just discovered the Godfather of Nazi science. I thought only a Nazi would graft monkey nuts on someone. That's pretty disturbing to say the least. Not so much that people were walking around barefoot in a lab with a pair of Gorilla nuts hanging down to their knees but that the "mad scientist" cliché we all know so well from schlock sci-fi was actually art imitating life.
Jeeesh.

Fact: You are most likely to lose your hearing than any of the other senses if you are hit by lightning.

Another Fact: 60% of electrocutions occur while talking on the phone during a thunderstorm.
What I took from this: It only makes sense.

Fact: The IRS employees' tax manual has instructions for collecting taxes after a nuclear war.

What I Took From This: I swear I will never make fun of Libertarians, low flying black helicopters, chem.-trails or paranoid right winged psycho-militia every again.
Anyone that is going to try to collect taxes from me even in the event of a nuclear holocaust has not only met but exceeded every criterion for evil that I can think of.

Fact: The same percentage of the American population that has internet access is the same percentage of native Africans that have AIDS.

What I Took From This: If there is a more fucked up statistic than this I don't want to hear it. Everyone I know has internet access.

Fact: In New Mexico, over eleven thousand people have visited a tortilla chip that appeared to have the face of Jesus Christ burned into it.

What I Took From This: Can someone please just give me one reason, just one fucking reason why Jesus would want to send humanity a sign by placing his face on a Doritio?