Just when you think Africa has a lock on crazy explanations for phenomenon that would otherwise be explainable a small Sicilian town has been plagued with a series of mysterious electrical fires and now some in the Catholic Church are publicly calling the fires the work of the devil.
Yes, the demonic possession of furniture and household appliances.
"I've seen things like this before," Catholic exorcist Gabriele Amorth told Italian daily Il Messagero. "Demons occupy a house and appear in electrical goods...Let's not forget that Satan and his followers have immense powers."
I understand the devil has immense powers but that is precisely why I am at a loss as to why he would use them to possess my vacuum cleaner.
"I've seen unplugged electrical cables burst into flames with my own eyes, but I just can't explain it," a local policeman who did not want to be named said Wednesday. "I've never seen anything like it."
The locals are terrified and statements like "You know, Satan can do some crazy shit" coming from the Church can't be helping matters.
"There has been a sense of panic and people have been evacuated from their homes," said Salvatore Mezzopane , who works at the town hall. "We're trying to find the cause of the fires but there are no answers yet."
The Italian utility company Enel even cut off power to the town but the fires continued to start.
Some homes have been engulfed with flames and because of the fires police had to evacuate some 40 residents from their homes.
So just in case you thought Africa had a monopoly on finding the most ass out explanations for shit make sure that you remember that the Catholic Church doesn't do much better.
The worst thing that happened to Africa was Catholic missionaries. Giving western credibility to "the devil possessed your washing machine" is inexcusable.