What we have here is believed to be the first trial ever, anywhere, to involve a self-confessed cannibal and an apparently willing victim.
What do you charge a man with that killed and cannibalized a willing victim?
Armin Meiwes , also known as the Rotenburg cannibal also known on the Internet as Franky the Master Butcher, apparently got his fetish for cannibalism from of all places American television, more specifically "Flipper" even more specifically Flipper's human friend "Sandy".
"I felt completely alone. I wanted an imaginary brother. I dreamed of someone like the teenager Sandy in the American TV series Flipper," Armin Meiwes told the court during his trial.
His fantasies involving "Sandy" were primarily surrounded around disemboweling and then eating him.
Funny, he didn't want to eat "Flipper" isn't it?
If "I felt so lonely" sounds familiar it should.
Jeffery Dahmer used the same "oh I was so lonely" defense to justify his killing spree. Dahmer told police that he felt so alone that he killed just so that no one would ever leave him.
Dahmer's neighbors often complained of the smell of rotten meat coming from his apartment and the noise of a circular saw at night while Dahmer was consummating his lifelong friendships.
Jeffrey Dahmer ended up being convicted of the murders of 17 men and boys and then died in prison after being ass raped by another convicted murderer with a broom handle.
I don't think Meiwes will meet the same fate.
According to his lawyer he has already made several friends in prison.
Armin Meiwes is a cannibal yes but is he a danger to society?
Believe it or not .I'm not sure.
How did Meiwes find his victim? He didn't. His victim found him from an advertisement Meiwes placed on the internet looking "young men for real slaughter and consumption for sexual satisfaction".
He didn't stalk the streets looking to prey upon unsuspecting people.
More importantly he didn't kill anyone that didn't want to be killed, as sick as that sounds.
His only real victim, Bernd Jurgen Brandes, was the first to answer the ad from Franky the master butcher.
Evidently Meiwes never misrepresented himself.
The prosecution and the defense are in total agreement on one point, Brandes came to meet Meiwes for one reason and one reason only, so he could be killed and eaten by Meiwes.
Meiwes' lawyer said Brandes "could not wait to be eaten".
The state prosecutor, Marcus Koehler , confirmed this by saying that Brandes "suffered from severe psychological problems and felt a desire to destroy himself".
Meiwes took Brandes to the attic where he had a specially designed "slaughter chamber" waiting for him. Brandes drugged himself up on sleeping pills and cold medicine and then cuddled on the floor with Meiwes.
After the drugs took effect.,Brandes began insisting that Meiwes "cut the thing off", referring to his penis, which Meiwes did and the two ate it together with salt, pepper and garlic.
It took Brandes 10 hours to bleed to death in Meiwes' slaughter chamber from his wounds and the whole time he was dying he kept encouraging Meiwes to continue slicing him up and eating him.
After Brandes was dead Meiwes admits that he frequently watched the video he had made while rubbing one off to it.
Often times he would then go to the kitchen and thaw out what he had saved of Brandes and eat more of him.
When Brandes was almost gone he went back on the Internet looking for other victims but no such luck.
It wasn't for a lack of responses however.
Other people answered the ad but were apparently more interested in acting out their fantasies, rather than actually getting killed.
Although disappointed when they changed their mind, Meiwes always let them go.
Some had even gotten as far as to mark out their body parts for possible consumption like they were cattle or what have you.
" There was a teacher, a cook, a hotel employee and a student. He had them hanging from the ceiling head down and they had no chance of freeing themselves. One felt sick, the other didn't want to go on, so he let them all down ," Meiwes's lawyer said.
Meiwes claimed he had contacted at least 400 people on the internet who showed interest in cannibalism.
" There are hundreds and thousands of people out there who want to be eaten ," he said.
And you wonder how serial killers are able to catch so many people.
Wonder no more.
How many people do you know would meet someone off the internet that they only know as Franky the master butcher , go to their house alone and allow this stranger to place them in a contraption where they are hanging head down from the ceiling completely helpless above a homemade slaughter chamber?
They might not be able to find out what to charge Meiwes with, considering that his victim was a willing participant and all, but I can think of at least four things maybe six in that story that should be crimes.
Crime number one: answering an ad for a dumb ass that would be kind enough to offer himself up to be cannibalized.
Crime number two: having a handmade specially designed "slaughter chamber" in your fucking attic. You might want to toss in even designing a slaughter chamber in the first place?
Crime number three: allowing a total stranger to place you in a contraption above his "slaughter chamber" that you can't get out of with his aid.
Crime number four: being a dick tease. This should be a crime regardless. How are you going to let him go so far as to get you in the slaughter chamber before you decide to change your mind?
Crime number five: eating a dick.
Crime number six: eating your own dick.
FYI to Meiwes future groupies (you know you're out there) Meiwes's hobbies include watch American Zombie movies and watching farm animals being slaughtered.
So put some thought into your christmas gifts.