RAW DOGMA written by Nkrumah Steward
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| scientists are designing spacecraft to crash
into comet |
No need to panic people. We're just going to ram into
it.
Engineers at Ball Aerospace and Technologies Corp are designing a
spacecraft for NASA that will be built for the sole purpose of smashing
into a comet.
That's $300 million dollars of our tax dollars hard at work.
Now I know what you're thinking.
At $300 million dollars a shot they better not miss.
They are essentially trying to hit a black object against a black
background in space.
That's pretty difficult to do. Maybe they should try to hit it with
some $500 rockets first.
You remember the last time they tried to land something on a celestial
body?
I believe it was Mars back in 1999 and it wasn't until the rocket
landed safely on the surface of the planet that someone realized that
someone forgot to put batteries in the Mars Polar Lander.
They haven't heard from it since.
My guess is that there must be a comet on a direct impact course with
the earth and this is just NASA's way of addressing the issue without
causing a huge uproar with the general population.
With people already thinking that we are about to collide with Mars
on August 27, 2003 when it comes the closets it has been to the earth
in 60,000 years they really don't need to be hearing about anything
that is really going to hit us.
I know what you're thinking now too.
How long have we got?
How much duct tape would it take to strap a nuclear warhead on the
front of that thing?
For $300 million dollars, once fully operational, I want to see NASA
demonstrate the full power of that glorified bottle rocket.
In all fairness I should give you the "official reason"
NASA plans on smashing a $300 million dollar spacecraft into a comet.
Officially, it is supposed to crash into the comet, kick up a lot
of dust so that NASA can see through an infrared light what kind of
chemicals are released from the comet after the impact.
They say that they hope the chemicals reveal more information about
the origins of the universe.
Ok.
Like we don't have enough craters here on the earth to study what
kind of shit a comet impact kicks up when it lands.
How about going back to the moon?
There's got to be about eleventybillion craters up there from comet
impacts that they could study.
Shit, they could probably get all the information they need from a
fucking telescope.
They've been telling us what chemicals make up the atmosphere of Neptune
for the last 40 years but suddenly they want to play stupid with what
a ball of ice, stone and dirt is made of to justify smashing a glorified
M80 into it at 22,000 mph.
I don't buy it.
But I tell you what I will buy.
Bottled water, Disani. Canned foods. Pretzels by the case. |