RAW DOGMA written by Nkrumah Steward
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mars will not kill you |
 During
the black out last week rumors started spreading around my neighborhood
that the people in Detroit where running amuck.
The way the story went, as soon as "the blacks" in Detroit
realized that the lights weren't coming back on anytime soon their
uncivilized amoral nature got the best of them and they had started
rioting.
They weren't rioting not out of anger mind you. They just saw an opportunity
to get some free shit.
If you let them tell the story, only a few hours after the power went
out, Detroit was reduced to smoldering ash.
You see in south eastern Michigan we live in the most racially segregated
area of the US according to the 2000 US census.
Detroit has the largest percentage of blacks of any American city
with a population over 100,000 people. And wouldn't you know that
just outside of Detroit in its suburb of Livonia you find the largest
percentage of whites of any American city with a population of 100,000
or more.
They are only six miles apart.
So six miles is all that separates the whitest city in America from
the blackest city in America.
And if you are familiar with the culture of southeastern Michigan
it wouldn't surprise you.
After the race riots in the 1960's white flight from Detroit was so
thoroughgoing, that almost overnight blacks in Detroit became an 80%
majority.
The point is that many whites that live in the surrounding suburbs
of Detroit have this illiberal opinion of Detroit and any rumor like
that just burns through them like a brush fire because it plays along
with what they already believe. When the Lions moved there two years
ago from Pontiac, whites were calling sports radio claiming that they
would never go to another Lions game again because they wouldn't be
caught dead in Detroit, because they think if they go there, they
will literally be caught dead in Detroit.
Well if you ask me there are too many people out there that are convinced
that the world is turning to shit.
With Mars being closer to the earth than it has been in 60,000 years
on August 27, 2003 those who know enough to be conversational about
astronomy, but not nearly enough to know what the fuck they are talking
about are causing a lot trouble. Namely with those already predisposed
to believing that when Jesus does come back to take his followers
with him back to heaven he is bringing a planet with him to ram us
with.
Remember God created the rainbow to remind us of his promise never
to try to wipe us all out again with a flood.
Woopdy.
Fucking.
Do.
I hate to break it you people but that still leaves a lot of weapons
in his arsenal.
Apparently, people are actually starting to be afraid that Mars is
actually going to collide with the earth.
Uh, kinda like it did 60,000 years ago the last time Mars came this
close to us?
Now we know what must've killed off the Neanderthal. Mars collided
with the earth and ricocheted off of us and into the orbit that it
holds now.
Even those who aren't quite stupid enough to believe that are still
fueling the fear by telling people that there will be earthquakes
and other natural disasters spurned on by the introduction of mar's
magnetic pull on our tiny little planet.
If you listen to them long enough girls won't need to wear bras next
week because Mar's gravitational pull will be pulling their tits up
by their necks!
Hold up people. Calm down.
Although it is true that Mars will be the closest it has been to the
earth in 60,000 years it will still be 34.65 million miles from us.
Other people think that Mars will look as big as the moon in our sky.
Come on people. If it was going to be that close to the earth you
would've been able to see Mars turn on its reverse thrusters sometime
last year after it came out of light speed.
So will it be as big as the moon next week?
Not quite.
You see that little red blip?
Where?
Over there between that star and that star.
No.
Look, follow my finger.
Oh, yeah I see it.
That's Mars.
Huh? If you hadn't pointed it out to me I would've never have found
it.
Exactly.
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