Japan Cult Threatens To Take Revenge On All Humankind
Damn, I guess Neo did save the world after all.
According to Yuko Chino, the guru of the Pana Wave Laboratory, civilization as we know it was supposed to be destroyed today when the magnetic poles were supposed to flip.
Not if Neo could help it.
Evidently this bitch didn't know that Neo had administrator rights.
Yuko Chino, claims that she will die of cancer within the next few days, and she is blaming her cancer on electromagnetic waves being sent out by communists.
That's like me saying that I get sick whenever I eat rice grown by Buddhists. Could I trouble you to be a bit more specific?
Chino told Fuji TV in Japan that she sleeps in a different place every night because of militant extremists. Evidently her followers are so pissed off about her being bombarded with electromagnetic waves all the time that they have threatened to take revenge for her death by "exterminating all humankind".
Hmmm, Ok then.
If you ask me, I am not quite sure which "extremists" she was referring to, the communists or the ones that are in her own group.
Evidently the Pana Wave Laboratory cult dress entirely in white, and before a Fuji TV reporter was allowed an interview Chino recently, he had to agree to remove his belt and any other metal object he had on him, wear a white robe and wrap all of his equipment in white cloths.
My only guess is that just like Green Lantern's power ring had no effect on yellow, whoever is going after her from the communist party with a pocket full of electromagnetic waves has a similar thing going on with white.
In John Lennon's lyric God Lennon sang that "God is a concept by which we measure our pain."
I disagree. God is a concept by which we measure our fear of death. For some of us, that fear of death is so strong, that they'll take to dressing in all-white, driving around in cars covered in white stickers with spirals on them and taking revenge out on the world because your manifestation of God didn't get enough fiber in her diet.
Like I said before, at the philosophical center of Yuko Chino's cult is the belief that the entire Earth will be devastated on the 15th of May by natural disasters caused by a sudden reversal of the magnetic poles.
That was today.
Do you think that any of her credibility was eroded by the magnetic poles not flipping over?
Not a chance.
Maybe she spared us at the last minute by magnifying the electromagnetic waves that the communists pinko fuckers where bombarding her with and by using nothing but her sheer willpower she is keeping the Earth on it's axis until she gets pissed off and decides we aren't worth saving.
May 15th, the day that most of the Western world was waiting in line to see The Matrix: Reloaded the world was about to be destroyed? Coincidence? I don't think so.
Damn, I guess Neo did save the world after all.
