RAW DOGMA written by Nkrumah Steward
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| 200 Pound Pet Burmese Python swallow's Man's 30 pound pit bull whole |
I love animals, but fuck a pet snake. At best, it is a big worm with a pattern on it. At worst it is hiding on top of your refrigerator waiting on your unsuspecting cat to mosey on over to his water bowl.
You see cats and dogs are what we call domesticated. Which is just a nice way of saying that they pretty much think that they are one of us.
A wild animal places everything in the world in two categories, "Does it eat me, or does it feed me." Believe me, a dog might lick his own balls and drink out of the toilet but it doesn't know anymore about a 200 pound Burmese python than you and I do. Just because you have an out door cat doesn't mean that you could drop it off in the fucking Serengeti and watch it revert back nature.
It would be just as much in awe watching a cheetah chase down a Gazelle as you or I would be.
Bringing an alligator home, or a python, or anything showcased on mutual or Omaha's wild kingdom is fucking cruel to your domesticated animals. When that snake is chasing your pet dog around the house when you leave for work in the morning it doesn't break for commercials.
Jerry Brown had purchased a 200-pound Burmese python. Whomever he bought it from told him not to worry about feeding the snake, "it only eats twice a year".
That is all nice and dandy but when is the last time it ate?
Brown used to be the owner of a Burmese Python and a 9-month-old 30 pound Pit Bull.
Now he is just the proud owner of a Burmese Python.
Police responded to a call at 1:23 a.m. from Brown that both his pit bull and his python were missing.
It didn't take long from Brown and Officer Rudy Estrada to find the python under the house with a 30-pound bulge in its belly. The python had swallowed his pit bull whole. Apparently, the snake is vulnerable after eating, so it went to look for a place to hide while it digested the dog.
"The snake had the dog for dinner," Sgt. Andre Matthews said. "It's hard to believe the pit bull didn't rip the snake to pieces. But those snakes just get hold and keep squeezing until they stop kicking."
It took Brown and his friend 45 mins to get the snake out from under the house. The police stood back and watched for safety reasons.
Let this be a lesson to you exotic animal lovers that think that you can just bring anything home and every animal in your house will live in harmony like the wonderful world of Disney.
You can never trust something that only eats once or twice a year because it leaves you no recourse to training the beast. You can't offer a snake a Scooby snack to get it to roll over, beg, or sit. That bastard is going to do what the fuck it wants whenever it wants.
Animal control officials are investigating the incident to determine if the python is considered a wild animal and in violation of city municipal code, officer Matthews said.
If that snake isn't "wild" then I want to see their definition of "domesticated". |
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